Marriage counselling can be a valuable source of support for any couple who is facing issues and difficulties in their married life. It can help address issues with trust, communication, intimacy, parenting, etc. However, discussing the topic of marriage counselling with your husband or spouse can be an overwhelming task.
In this article, we will look at how you can approach this difficult conversation effectively so that you and your husband can have a productive discussion on the topic
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Organize Your Thoughts
Since the topic of marriage counselling is usually overwhelming, it might be a good idea to write or make a list of points that you want to discuss with your husband during the conversation. This exercise will help you gain clarity about how and what you want to convey to your husband.
Make sure you include points around what you would like to achieve from marriage counselling and why it might be the right time for you to consider it as a couple, The more clarity you have, the easier it will be to talk to your husband.
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Pick A Good Time And Place
It can be difficult to have a conversation around marriage counselling when either you or your husband are already stressed. So, make sure you select a time when both of you are relaxed and free from distractions. Also, create or choose a comfortable space where you can talk openly without interruptions.
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Share Your Feelings And Concerns
Start the conversation by expressing your feelings honestly and respectfully. Make sure you share your feelings in a non-confrontational and productive way so that your husband doesn’t feel blamed. A good way to convey your feelings in a non-blaming way is by using ‘I; statements. For example, say, “I’ve been feeling concerned about our relationship lately, and I think we could benefit from marriage counselling’’.
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Frame It As A ‘We Thing’
Once you have expressed your concerns regarding the relationship, reassure your husband that you are not blaming him for the issues in the relationship, rather, you want to work as a team to make the relationship better For example- I believe we can address the recent communication issues with the help of marriage counselling’’.
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Focus On The Benefits
Highlight how marriage counselling can potentially benefit your relationship, emphasizing that counselling is a proactive step toward strengthening your bond and resolving issues constructively. Reiterate that seeking marriage counselling means both of us are committed to each other and want to create a long-lasting marriage.
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Consider Your Husband’s Perspective
Once you have shared your thoughts, acknowledge that the prospect of marriage counselling can be overwhelming. Then, let your husband express any thoughts and opinions that he has about the idea. Listen actively without interrupting or dismissing his feelings. Validate his emotions, even if he is resistant to the idea of counselling.
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Provide Reassurance
Assure your husband that you are willing to work through challenges together and help him address any concerns or doubts that he has regarding marriage counselling. Providing reassurance indicates that you and your husband are on the same team
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Have Patience
Understand that seeking marriage counselling is not an easy decision, so allow your husband time to process his emotions and make a decision. Allow him to ask any questions as well.
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Reaching Out
If your husband agrees to marriage counselling, make it a collaborative effort by researching therapists together and choosing a therapist that you both feel comfortable with.
Conclusion:
Initiating the conversation about marriage counselling can be extremely difficult. However, you can make it easier by approaching the conversation with clarity, sensitivity and an open mind. By choosing the right time and approach, expressing your concerns honestly, highlighting the benefits, offering support, considering your husband’s perspective, and being patient, you can navigate this discussion effectively and take positive steps toward strengthening your marriage.
If you are looking for marriage counselling, click here to book a session with a trained couples therapist at Mind Voyage right away.
References:
- Couples Counselling: How to Ask Your Partner to go to Therapy | One Life Counselling & Coaching. (2020, February 2). https://onelifecounsellingcoaching.com/blog/how-ask-your-partner-go-therapy/
- How to talk to your partner about Couples Therapy. (n.d.). Cerebral. Retrieved April 25, 2024, from https://cerebral.com
