You might have seen a lot of Bollywood movies ending with the lead couple getting married and living happily ever after. However, marriage is much more complex in real life. It requires intentional mental and emotional preparation to build a successful and fulfilling partnership. Whether you are newly engaged or planning to get married, here are a few tips that can help you prepare for a healthy and lasting future.
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Self-Reflection
Before stepping into the big journey of marriage, take time to reflect and understand yourself. Do you feel comfortable and ready to start a new life with your partner? What are your plans and aspirations for your future? How do you envision your married life? Reflecting on these questions will give you insight into your feelings and readiness for marriage.
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Share Your Feelings
Once you are clear about your thoughts and feelings, share them with your partner. Have an open and honest conversation about your dreams, hopes and any concerns before marriage. Allow your partner to share their thoughts and feelings as well. Listen to each other without judgment. Openly talking about your feelings builds emotional intimacy and mutual support.
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Discuss What Marriage Means
While this may sound odd, different people may have different ideas of marriage. Some people might view marriage as a legal construct, while others might see it as a partnership based on shared goals. Both of you must understand each other’s idea of marriage so that you are on the same page.
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Talk About Values
Your values are beliefs and principles that guide your everyday choices and lifestyles. Hence, partners must know and understand each other’s values to ensure that they are compatible with each other. Talk about career, aspirations, religion, financial habits, priorities, etc. to understand each other’s values
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Clarify Expectations
Every relationship is based on expectations; sometimes these expectations are explicitly stated while they are unsaid at other times. Unsaid expectations can often lead to conflict and resentment. Be honest with each other regarding your expectations from your partner post-marriage. Likewise, discuss any deal-breakers—things you absolutely cannot compromise on—to ensure clarity.
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Set Shared Goals
Creating a shared vision for the future can strengthen your relationship. Whether it’s buying a house, starting a family or achieving mutual career growth, setting clear goals can motivate you to work as a team.
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Address The Important Topics
Make sure you address all the topics that can help you build a strong future together, such as:
- How will you manage finances and savings together?
- Are you on the same page about having children and starting a family?
- How do you envision yourself dealing with conflicts and disagreements?
- What role do you see your families and friends playing in your married life?
While these questions may seem tough, addressing them before marriage ensures you are going into it with clarity.
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Be Flexible
No marriage or relationship is ideal, and you may not be on the same page as your partner about every issue. So leave some room for compromise and adjustment. Mutual acceptance and support are crucial to lasting relationships.
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Consider Pre-Marriage Therapy
The decision to step into married life can be an overwhelming one, even if you have been in a relationship with your partner for a number of years. In such situations, premarital counselling can provide both partners with a safe space to address their feelings and offer strategies to step into the journey of marriage effectively.
Conclusion:
Marriage is a lifelong journey that requires preparation and patience. You and your partner can establish a fulfilling relationship by engaging in self-reflection, open communication, and aligning your goals, expectations and values. Lastly, remember that no relationship or marriage is perfect, so give each other enough time, acceptance and support through the process.
References:
- Bridestory. (n.d.). 9 Things You Can Do to Mentally Prepare for Marriage—Bridestory Blog. Bridestory. Retrieved December 24, 2024, from https://www.bridestory.com/blog/9-things-you-can-do-to-mentally-prepare-for-marriage
- University, U. S., & F, J. (n.d.). How to Prepare For Marriage Before and During Engagement. Retrieved December 24, 2024, from https://extension.usu.edu/hru/blog/how-to-prepare-for-marriage-before-and-during-engagement
- (2018, January 25). 21 Helpful Pointers for Couples Preparing for Marriage. Marriage Advice – Expert Marriage Tips & Advice. https://www.marriage.com/advice/pre-marriage/preparing-for-marriage/
