Couples therapy can be a valuable source of support for couples who are struggling with issues in their relationship. However, it is crucial to find the right therapist who fits your needs so that you can make the most out of the process. 

Finding the right therapist might be challenging, as most couples are not aware of what they should look for when choosing a couples therapist, especially if they are stepping into couples therapy for the first time. In this article, we will share some tips for choosing a good couples therapist.

  • Consider Your Needs

Even before you and your partner start looking for a couples therapist, both of you must take time to reflect and identify your needs and preferences. Discussing your respective needs also ensures that you and your partner are on the same page and can look for a therapist that is comfortable for both of you. Some questions that will help you reflect on your needs are:

  • What do we want to achieve from the couples therapy process? (Goals)
  • Do you and your partner have any specific preferences around the age, religious background of the therapist?
  • Do you prefer a therapist with a particular expertise? (ex-pre-marital counseling)

It will be easier to find the right therapist when you and your partner are clear about your needs.

  • Ask For Referrals

Consider asking for referrals from friends or family members who have experienced couples therapy. However, it is important to remember that every couple is unique, thus a therapist who has been helpful to someone you know might not be able to fit your needs the best or vice-versa

  • Research Therapists

Consider searching for therapists in your area who offer couples therapy. You can also look at online platforms providing couples therapy services.

  • Check For Qualifications

As couples therapy is a specialized field, not every therapist is qualified to offer couples therapy services. Thus, it is important to look for therapists with the right qualifications. Some qualifications to look for in a couples therapist are:

  • A Master’s Degree In Counseling Or Clinical Psychology
  • Specialized Training In Couple Therapy or Additional training in couples therapy approaches such as Emotionally Focused Therapy (EFT) or Gottman’s Method
  • Check For Reviews

Apart from qualifications, online reviews can be an indicator of a couple’s therapist’s effectiveness, so consider reading a few reviews before booking a session with a particular therapist

  • Ask For A Consultation Call Before Booking

Most therapists would be open to having a short consultation call with couples before the first session. Getting to know a therapist before the first session can also help build trust and comfort with them. A few questions you can ask potential therapists are:

  • What are your qualifications?
  • What types of approaches do you use?
  • What does therapy with you look like?
  • Have you dealt with the issues that we are facing?
  • What type of couples do you generally work with?
  • How long have you been working with couples?

  • Have Patience

Once you find the therapist that meets your needs, it is important to continue with them atleast for a few sessions to access compatibility and effectiveness, as couples therapy is a process that takes time. Expecting immediate results or solutions only after 2-3 sessions may lead to unrealistic expectations.

What Are The Qualities Of A Good Couples Therapist?

. Here are some essential qualities to look for when searching for a couples therapist:

  • The therapist should provide the couple with a safe and non-judgemental space to express their concerns. Both partners should feel comfortable with the therapist
  • The therapist must possess the qualifications described above
  • The therapist must empower the couple with tools and techniques to meet their goals, instead of offering advice or imposing their own suggestions on the couple
  • The therapist must have a clear plan and structure for helping the couple achieve their goals
  • The therapist must actively listen to both partners while maintaining a neutral perspective
  • The therapist must be open to seeking feedback from the couple and make changes to the treatment plan accordingly.


Couples therapy can be helpful and beneficial for many couples, provided they work with the right therapist who meets their needs. Finding the right therapist involves steps like reflecting on your goals, needs from couples therapy, asking for referrals, researching therapists and asking questions of potential therapists. It is also important to remember that couples therapy takes time, thus commitment and patience are crucial parts of the process. 


  1. Benson, K. (2020, March 4). How to Find a Couples Therapist Who Can Actually Help You. The Gottman Institute.
  2. LCSW-C, E. K. (2023, January 27). How to Find a Good Marriage Counselor. Talkspace.
Dhruva Koranne

Dhruva Koranne has completed his Masters in Applied Psychology from Tata Institute of Social Sciences, BALM. He has been practicing as a counsellor since 2020 and works to create a safe space for clients where they can open up. In addition to this, Dhruva loves researching and studying about upcoming theories in the field of Psychology. Connect with him on Linkedin